Agnostic + Buddhist = SDA
My father grew up irreligious. My mother was essentially Buddhist. God had incredible plans for them together.
My father and mother are high school sweethearts. When my father immigrated with his family to the US from South Korea, he was 17. He had been dating my mom for 1 day. For three years they wrote love letters to each other. My father went to high school in the States and then took his GED. He joined the US Army at 17, after working at Jack In the Box for a few months. His supervisor in the military found out my dad had a girlfriend in Korea and consequently shipped him out to Yong San, a US military base in Korea. My parents married and, after over 35 years of marriage, have seven children and eight grandchildren (they are only 56 years old). Of their seven children, only 3 have children so far. We are planning on giving them over 20 grandkids total.
For all descriptive purposes, we are the Sound of Music family. There are 5 girls and 2 boys. Our father was in the military and raised us by making us do pushups if our rooms were messy (in 1984 he was declared “Drill Sergeant of the Year” for the entire US Army. He was the first Korean American to do so). But it was my mother who has helped him tone down a little and be the awesome father he has become. I always joke that because there were so many kids, they couldn’t afford music lessons like most Korean parents, and so we sang. We sing because our voices are free.
Looking at our background, there is no way that God could have brought us into the Seventh-day Adventist Church. My dad is a Green Beret and has been all over the world on missions that I do not know about, and that he still can’t talk about. He went to Somalia on three separate missions in the early 90’s and faced some pretty incredible situations. If there ever was someone that went against what our church stands for, it’s probably my dad.
When my aunt passed away at 19 years of age, my dad’s family was grief stricken. An Adventist pastor was at the hospital and began talking to my grandfather. My grandfather was pretty much agnostic, but he realized that if you wanted to follow the Bible, you should be a Seventh-day Adventist. My parents were Christians by this time and so my grandfather paid them to take Bible studies. The pastor found an elder that was around my dad’s age to give him Bible studies. Three years later, my parents were baptized. In the process of giving Bible studies, the elder’s wife said something to my mom. At the time, my parents had four daughters. The elder and his wife had only one. The elder’s wife said, “Jesus is coming soon. We don’t have a lot of time. Because of all your children, you won’t be able to do God’s work.” I think that really offended my mom but also challenged her.
Many Adventist Asian parents raise their kids to become doctors and dentists or wish their children had become one: academics are the most important thing. For my parents, spirituality and character were the what they emphasized in our lives. My dad told us that he wouldn’t walk us down the aisle unless we married pastors. Three of us did marry pastors. My second sister married a doctor. Most Asian parents would have welcomed that doctor into the family with open arms, but not my dad. With the most serious look on his face, he told him, “You hurt my daughter…” and pointed his finger like a gun to the poor guy. Thankfully, they really love him now.
After my dad retired from the military at the old age of 39, my mom set out on a mission to do family ministry. When I was in middle school, my three older sisters and I formed a vocal quartet called Chosen 4 One and we went around to different churches doing concerts and programs. Our whole family was involved. We would sing and share short testimonies between songs. My dad and/or my mom would share a sermonette. The younger siblings were much younger but we would sometimes have them share a children’s song.
Now we are all grown and out of the house. My youngest sibling just went to boarding academy and my parents are left with an empty house. It isn’t easy for them and they feel that they have really failed as parents. Yet, I look at my family and see that all seven children are proud to be Seventh-day Adventists. None us ever experimented with drugs. We are active in our local churches. As I raise my daughter as a pastor’s kid, my greatest desire is that I can give her the love and stability that I grew up with. It is true that my parents made quite a few mistakes, but they were not hypocrites and they prayed for us. They prayed out loud for us in the living room, all the time.
When I think of our past and how God has led my family into the knowledge of the Bible, I am filled with amazement, gratitude, and humility. I later found out that the elder that brought my family into the church was an abusive man to his wife and a great hypocrite. Yet, God used him to bring salvation into my family. My own father was an emotionally detached, proud man until God brought him into the church. I see how living a true Seventh-day Adventist lifestyle doesn’t narrow your mind and perspective unless you make it. For my family, it brought such a great understanding of the love of God. I am truly grateful to have been brought into this church that has encouraged me to look at the world through my God-colored glasses and to spread the love of God to those around me. The last few years as a pastor’s wife has been challenging as I adjusted to being a wife, doing church work and now motherhood; but I am grateful for the relationships, wisdom and guidance found through God, the Bible, the church and through my many friends.
Maria Kim is wife of Pastor Daniel Park and mother of Baby Faith. They minister at RoC Fellowship of Oregon Central Korean SDA Church.