I Love Being a Dad
I love being a dad. I never thought I would become one again. To clarify, we welcomed a new baby to our family on March 17, about 2 hours before my own birthday. I won’t state my exact age but I am not a young man anymore. I definitely notice this fact in the late night and early morning awakenings with my daughter. This experience has put a new perspective on life for me. I have 4 children now and I love them all, with all my heart. But, there is something special about my new baby. I look into her face and feelings well up in my heart. When she smiles at me, I melt. I cannot help it and I cannot explain it. I love this feeling. I will do anything for her. I will do all that is necessary for her well-being. I pray for her everyday and every chance I get. I pray for the riches blessings from God for her. Often, when I look into her face I see so much of myself.
Throughout all this I am reminded of my own father and his sacrifice. As a typical Korean American immigrant family, they worked hard to make a living. They worked 365 days a year and 14 to 16 hours a day. He was not a perfect father but he did do his best for us to survive and for his children to have a chance at a better life. As such, his children have done better and have moved up in social status. I think he would be the first to admit that he was not the best or the most faithful Christian in the past. Today, he is the most devoted and faithful Christian man and father. I believe with all my heart that he will be one of the redeemed, in the new earth.
My father used to be a typical Korean father. In our youth, I remember my father as stern and cold man. I do not recall a warm moment we ever had. I don’t recall a kind or encouraging word he ever gave me. One memory I have from my school days, was a report card that I got in elementary school. I got all A’s, except in one subject I got a B+. It was in art, no less. As a typical Korean father, he really focused on the B+. It was not in the positive sense but in the negative. He asked me why I got a B+ in art. He may not have intended to be negative but the only thing he focused on was the B+ and how to improve it to an A. He never made a positive comment about the rest of the grades. For me this was most discouraging. It did not have a good effect on me. I did not fail and get F’s the rest of my school years. However, it did affect me to a point where I did not excel in school until later on in life. As he changed and became more loving and tender, he would show his love and care towards me in simple ways. I now cherish the hand written birthday cards he writes to me every year. He writes it in Korean, which I do not read well, however, I sense the love and encouragement he always writes. I have collected all the birthday cards he has written to me with the $50 dollar check he writes me. I don’t cash it but I save it as a reminder of his love.
I am fortunate to have had this experience with my father. Sometimes, having something to compare to, has a way of deepening our appreciation of what we experience currently. Now, I am experiencing a more loving relationship with my father. I get to experience this with my own children. My experience with my father and my own children has been such a blessing. I am truly experiencing something wonderful in my life right now. I remember the night my latest daughter was born. I was praying with tears of joy and contemplating how wonderful this feeling of love, which I was sensing, seem to be. It was then a voice seem to say to me, “I love you more than this!” I love everything about my new daughter, I love her from head to toe and everything else about her. Even her cries and antics make me happy. I even love changing her diaper when she poops, which I have a hard time believing I am saying. However, I have to say that the smell is repulsive. I am reminded that when Jesus talks about His love for us, it goes past the repulsiveness of our sins.
But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Roman 5:8)
My experience in life currently is wonderful and would not exchange it for anything. I feel so blessed lately and am so thankful to God for it. I appreciate all that the Lord is allowing me to experience in my life lately. Yet, I think the greatest blessing, is the appreciation of the love of God for us.
I have loved you with an everlasting love…(Jeremiah 31:3)
Dr. Jae Park is a physician practicing in Warsaw, IN and attends the Living Word Fellowship in Berrien Springs, MI. He is also a sponsor for the English Compass.