In Guyana
My heart twitched in the stillness of the silent night. To be more exact, right on top of my chest, inside my clothes, something moved. Afraid of the unknown, I put my hands on top of my chest carefully and … AHHH! Something stung me! At that exact moment, my bunk bed also collapsed.
I turned the flashlight on and cautiously looked under my shirt – there was a huge bee inside! I quickly grabbed it and threw it outside of the mosquito net. The reality of where I was sunk in, and I felt like God was trying to tell me, “Pull yourself together! It’s just the beginning.” And like that, the curtain closed on my first night in Guyana.
It’s already been three months since my return to the States, but I still remember that first night vividly. The whole trip was memorable and as I reminisce now, I realize even more how precious each moment was.
In Guyana, it took 2 hours to eat rice because we had to separate each grain: white grain, rotten grain, bug-eaten grain . . . I thought to myself, “If God were to distinguish me from others what kind of grain would I be? Yellow rice, rotten rice, bug-eaten rice? Probably all three combined. Good thing God looks at Jesus instead of my ugly self.”
Every day, we walked countless miles from the Bethany Medical Missionary College to the Village of Bethany. One day, I looked down at my feet without thinking. Then I looked at my church kids’ feet. They were all as black as charcoal, covered in dirt and dust. As I looked at those feet, I pictured Christ’s gentle hands washing the unclean feet of His beloved disciples. I used to think that their feet were dirty due to improper hygiene, but I suddenly realized that they had become dirty by following Jesus in ministry.
The truth is, our feet are dirty regardless of how much or how little we work. We are always covered by sin. But when we devote our lives to God, when we help others, He removes our blindness and shows our need for cleansing. In reaching out to others, we realize our true condition and feel the need for Christ’s healing hands.
In Guyana, I remember my clothes being soaked with sweat after singing just one hymn. But the joy, sincerity, and holiness that I felt in that moment was inexpressible. The long hours in VBS in the morning, the physical labor in the afternoon, getting paint poisoning, walking everywhere, drinking brown water, fighting heat and humility, and trying to avoiding snakes, scorpions, pumas, and mosquitoes all somehow amplified my thanksgiving to God. Soaked with the Holy Spirit, we sang our hearts out. Every word of the hymn was imprinted into our hearts.
Guyana taught me that I live in a strange unfamiliar world. Guyana was so uncomfortable and unfamiliar that I missed home. This world is also not my true home. In Guyana, the currency rate is $200 to $1 US dollar. The values that this world offers me, the things of the world, are probably not even worth 1/200th, 1/2000th, or 1/infinity compared to the values of heaven.
There were no mirrors in Guyana. But in Guyana, there was a moon that reflected my heart. There were no lights to shine my room. But in Guyana, there were billions of stars that illuminated the world.
When it came time for me to leave, I was anxious not to forget the God I encountered in Guyana. I didn’t want to leave Him there; I didn’t want to lose Him. So at the airport, on my bed, and in the bus, I resolved repeatedly never to let go of that God. Looking at the stars, I prayed, “God, I will always remember you. Please remember me.”
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying to me, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?”
Then I said, "Here I am, Lord. Send me!" (Isaiah 6:8).
____________
Pastor Isaac Lee is currently working at the Queens Korean SDA Church.